My Diary
 
 
 
In direct view of our Kitchen window stands a line of trees and mature shrubs which I often find myself gazing at when at a loose end (that man has too much time on his hands!). One day, circa August 07, I noticed a small brightly coloured bird sitting in one of the trees. I found its beauty quite breathtaking. After consulting my Collins Gem Bird Guide (I must confess to being a bit of a ‘twitcher) I identified the bird as being a Goldfinch. A tiny bird, with white cheeks and a distinctive red face. Now, I am unable to explain why but seeing this Goldfinch had a curious and profound affect on me, and somehow this beautiful creature became a metaphor for Jacob beating his cancer. I began to believe (truly believe) that whenever this bird returned, Jacob was being cured. I spent many long periods during the time when Nicky and Jacob were away during his treatment with little to do, and often found myself just watching, waiting for the Goldfinch to return. Anyway, time passed and as you will all know Jacob did not respond to his treatment and for a while things looked quite grim to say the least. Then one day I found myself reflecting on the fact that the Goldfinch had not returned during this whole period. However, during all the bad news we received over many months, I continued to watch from the window, hoping, but still there was no sign of the Goldfinch. So, here we are in June 08. The fantastic news is that Jacob has now achieved remission. This does not mean he is cured, more his cancer is showing no evidence of spreading. His most recent bone marrow biopsies have once again come back absolutely free of cancer and the signs are better than we ever could have imagined six months ago. We have not celebrated as we know we still have a battle ahead and, to be perfectly frank, we have seen too much to dare to be too positive. We just take each day as it comes and know we are blessed to still have our darling Jacob with us, his laughter still filling our lives and his warmth and love still touching our hearts. Jacob has yet more treatment to come and is currently receiving radiotherapy to his primary tumour site, with one more week to go. Following this will be a treatment called cis-retinoic acid. This is an oral medication given to ‘switch off’ any residual cancer cells in order to help prevent relapse of the neuroblastoma. After this treatment and if Jacob remains in remission, it will be a case of him receiving regular scans and check ups for the foreseeable future and perhaps for the rest of his life. We still have a ‘Plan B’ of course and this has been made possible by all those wonderful people who stood by us, supported us and lifted us through our darkest days - you know who you are and we can never thank you enough. For now though, our ‘Plan B’ has been filed away and our hope is that we never need to use the funds which are held by Jacob’s charity. If never needed by Jacob, the funds (which continue to grow)will be used to help treat other children with neuroblastoma supported by Jacob’s charity. Oh, and by the way, a family of Goldfinches now visit our garden everyday. We spend many happy moments watching them feed their babies. Well, like I said, it’s a funny thing!
Sunday, 22 June 2008
A Funny Thing